It happens more often than people admit.

You hand in your notice and brace yourself for the exit conversation. Instead, your boss surprises you with an offer to stay - more money, a new title, maybe the flexibility you’ve been asking for all along. It’s flattering, even validating. But it’s also a trap.
Counter offers are one of those workplace moments that feel good in the short term but rarely end well. They play on emotion - the need to feel valued, the fear of change, the comfort of the familiar. Yet once the dust settles, most people find themselves back in the same position they were in before, wondering why they stayed.

Studies back this up. Research by the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development shows that more than 70% of employees who accept a counter offer leave within a year anyway.

Not because the offer wasn’t generous, but because the reasons for leaving - lack of growth, culture misalignment, burnout - don’t disappear just because the salary changes.

As Jade, one of our directors, says: ‘A counter offer buys time, not loyalty. It’s a temporary fix for a permanent problem.'

The truth is, once you’ve made the decision to go, something fundamental shifts in the relationship between you and your employer. The trust that held things together begins to fray. You’re no longer seen the same way. Even if everyone stays polite, the unspoken question lingers: when will they try to leave again?

For many, accepting a counter offer also brings a kind of emotional hangover. The flattery fades, replaced by awkwardness. You start to see the cracks you ignored before. The projects you were frustrated with are still there. The dynamics that made you feel stuck haven’t changed.

The raise starts to feel like a bribe rather than a reward.

Employers make counter offers for a simple reason: it’s easier to retain than to replace. Hiring new people takes time, money and energy. But keeping someone with a pay rise doesn’t address why they wanted to go in the first place.

It’s the equivalent of patching a leak rather than fixing the pipe.

For the employee, it’s worth asking a few hard questions before accepting:
– Will the issues that made me want to leave truly change?
– Is this offer about my growth or their convenience?
– How will this affect my credibility or opportunities long-term?

It’s also important to remember that the moment you resign, you’ve shown you’re willing to walk away. Even if you stay, that knowledge changes how leadership sees you. When the next round of restructuring comes - or when promotion opportunities arise - you may find yourself quietly overlooked.

Suhrab, one of our finance consultants, often says: ‘A counter offer can make you feel wanted, but it rarely makes you feel fulfilled.' And fulfilment is the real reason people stay - not pay rises.

This isn’t to say every counter offer is wrong. In rare cases, it can spark an honest conversation that resets the relationship. Some employers genuinely use it to fix structural issues and re-engage valued talent. But those are the exceptions, not the rule.
If you’re considering a move, clarity is your best ally. Know your motivations before you start. If it’s salary, have that conversation early. If it’s progression, map your path before frustration builds. If it’s culture, pay attention to the warning signs. The best resignations are not emotional reactions but well-considered steps toward something better.

Leaving a company should never feel like betrayal. It’s part of growth - yours and theirs. Accepting a counter offer can feel like safety, but in most cases, it’s a step backward disguised as security.

Careers are long. Loyalty matters, but not at the expense of momentum. If you were ready to leave, trust that instinct. Move forward, not back.

The next chapter doesn’t start until you close the last one properly.